Death. It terrorizes. It paralyzes. If it doesn’t keep us up at night, it wakes us up. It is so certain to come for all of us but when and what follows is so uncertain. We know what we have here and knowing is comforting. Not knowing what awaits there, in death, has tortured minds of every era of the human being. The great mystery. The great unknown. The great inevitable. And for most, the great fear.<\/p>\n
As it has been feared for as long as life can be traced back, there must be some good answers on how to overcome that fear. There are.<\/p>\n
Abundant across the readings of Stoic<\/a> philosophy is practical advice on living a good life. Central to this philosophy is three disciplines \u2014 perception, action, and will. More depth on each will follow, but in a few words: perception is how we see things, action is how we respond, and will is how we endure. Just as they are useful to how we live, together, these three interdependent, interwoven, fluidly contingent disciplines also constitute a comprehensive approach to death.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Perception is our field of vision. It\u2019s the way we see things. It\u2019s our field of thought. And what we see and think shapes what we do. Perception is the discipline behind the Stoic theory of cognition. To understand perception, it is important to understand this theory, because it is a universal order of Stoic philosophy. It is something Marcus Aurelius<\/a>, Epictetus, Seneca<\/a>, Cato, the fathers of Stoicism all write or speak about extensively. The all-pervading force, the\u00a0logos\u2013<\/em>termed by the Stoics to explain that which all things are determined\u2013designates, in short, an ability that no other animal was gifted. We have the cognitive capacity to use our perception to see a singular event as either<\/i> \u201cgood\u201d or \u201cevil\u201d based solely on an interpretation imposed by an initial impression. Stoics called it “the faculty of reason” or “the faculty of choice,” and with it, they said there was no such thing as good or evil. Those are simply a product of personal judgment.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n In Gregory Hays\u2019s translation of Meditations, <\/em>he explains this in three parts. Put simply, something happens, it produces an expression in our minds, which we then turn into our perception \u2013 how we see that thing, how we interpret its meaning. In this way, we always have the power of choice.<\/p>\n The French scholar, Pierre Hadot, wrote about this Stoic focus on our judgments at length in a brilliant book called\u00a0The Inner Citadel<\/em><\/strong><\/a>, his great study on the thoughts of\u00a0Marcus Aurelius<\/strong><\/a>. Marcus stressed the need for keeping a constant watch on our ruling reason. He considered it the critical to the task of maintaining the peace and calm of this inner fortress.<\/p>\n The Stoics spent a considerable amount of time and energy thinking about and trying to master their perception because perception shapes behavior. If our perceptions are clouded, colored with ephemera, with nonsense, or if they\u2019ve simply been subject to, fused by, our circumstances and environments, things like fear, anxiety, lack of confidence, trepidation, and overall unhappiness find their way in. You can think of this process of perceptions forming the same way you would habits. Habits form from hearing, practicing, saying the same thing day after day. Much the same, perceptions become ingrained through repeated thought and practice.<\/p>\n In this way, perceptions can be a powerful source of strength and resolve or a powerful source of weakness and horror. It\u2019s a truth that should comfort. You\u2019re in control. You get to make the choice. The thoughts, the interpretations, the impressions you currently carry can be, with some attention and resilience, flipped upside down to better serve you.<\/p>\n As it relates to death, the disciplining of perception becomes a vital ally in silencing then muting then reversing death\u2019s terror. By taking control of our perceptions and wielding them properly, we can stop cramping in fear. Fearing death evolves from the trained and reinforced impression that life ending, the endless void must be perceived as devastating and tragic. What would it look like with a different perception? Epictetus<\/a> has an answer,<\/p>\n \u00a0<\/em>\u201cUnder no circumstances ever say \u2018I lost something,\u2019 only \u2018I returned it.\u2019 DId a child of yours die? No, it was returned. Your wife died? No, it was returned…Why concern yourself with the means by which the original giver effects its return? As long as he entrusts it to you, look after it as something yours to enjoy only for a time \u2013 the way a traveller regards a hotel.\u201d <\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n Ask, How am I looking at death? Can I look at it differently? Can I look at death objectively? The philosopher and pioneer of the essay as a literary genre, Michel de Montaigne, a millennia after Epictetus<\/a>, wrote one of his 107 essays, titled \u201cThat To Study Philosophy Is To Learn To Die.\u201d In Montaigne\u2019s thorough examination of our eternally conflicted relationship with death, he argues the idea that learning to dies is a prerequisite to learning to live and to do so, he makes a reference to this work of Epictetus and the school of Stoicism,<\/p>\n \u201cThe Romans, by reason that this poor syllable death sounded so harshly to their ears and seemed so ominous, found out a way to soften and spin it out by a periphrasis, and instead of pronouncing such a one is dead, said, \u2018Such a one has lived,\u2019 or \u2018Such a one has ceased to live\u2019\u00a0\u2026provided there was any mention of life in the case, though past, it carried yet some sound of consolation.\u201d<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n That\u2019s where we start. As Epictetus<\/a> said, “Death and pain are not frightening, it’s the fear of pain and death we need to fear.” So we redefine death. With a shift of perspective, a reframing of thought, a new impression cultivated than reinforced of what death looks like in our imagination\u2013the only place we can see it afterall\u2013we\u2019re on our way to no longer fearing death.<\/p>\n Perception is how we reinterpret death. Action is what we do about it. What are you doing about this fear? Are you letting it torment you? Are you pushing it out of you mind until it revisits? Remember, it\u2019s called \u201cconquering your fears.\u201d Conquering! Conquering requires actions. If we\u2019re passive towards death, it does become harrowing, it does grow stronger, it\u2019s shadow does grow darker. Death can be both a polarizing and paralyzing subject matter. We don\u2019t like to think about it. We don\u2019t like to talk about it. We wouldn\u2019t dare imagine it happening to us. But that\u2019s exactly what we should <\/em>be doing. That\u2019s what we do about it. We don\u2019t let it linger over us. We don\u2019t let deaths torments come and go as they so please. We don\u2019t let it fester. We stare it down. We use it to motivate, not paralyze. And then we live accordingly.<\/p>\n The Stoics made it routine to keep the prospect of death in mind. It wasn\u2019t to be a morbid practice. It was quite the opposite, actually. Death\u2019s torture largely comes from this multi-layered paradox of sorts that though it is life\u2019s great uncertainty, it is too life\u2019s greatest inescapable truth. We\u2019re certain it will happen, we just don\u2019t know when, how, or what follows it. We know it could come at any time, but it\u2019s easy feel it is plenty far away. It\u2019s easy to just say I\u2019ll think about that another time, I\u2019ll worry about that later. That only aids in swelling death\u2019s ambiguity, which is a great way to add to its ability to inflict fear. The Stoics avoid fear by inviting death in. By thinking about it regularly, by making death as common a part of their day as is breakfast, they remove deaths ambiguity to no longer be the great unknown that occasionally stops by. They make it just another part of the day, as\u00a0Epictetus<\/a>\u00a0taught his students,<\/p>\n \u201cDeath and pain are not frightening, it’s the fear of pain and death we need to fear…So be confident about death, and caution yourself against the fear of it \u2013 just the opposite, in other words, of what we are doing now. Now we shrink from death, whereas o<\/span>ur views about death hardly concern us, we hardly give them a thought, and are completely apathetic. Socrates used to call such fears ‘hobgoblins’, and rightly so; just as masks scare and frighten children since they haven’t seen them before, we react to events in much the same way and for much the same reason. What is a child? Ignorance and inexperience. But with respect to what it knows, a child is every bit our equal. What is death? A scary mask. Take it off \u2013 see, it doesn’t bite. \u201c<\/p><\/blockquote>\n Every day, uncover death, take off the mask, become acquainted.<\/p>\n We\u2019ve written here at Daily Stoic quite comprehensibly about the concept known as Memento Mori. <\/em><\/a>If you\u2019re new here or this idea of Memento Mori, <\/em>it\u2019s an Ancient Roman practice originated when early Roman generals returned home from battle victorious. Tradition had that the victor be welcomed by a celebration of inexplicable grandeur. On the day of his parade, the victor wore a crown and a purple, gold-adorned toga, otherwise reserved for kings. His four-horse chariot parted the streets lined with thanks-givers chanting in praise. He, in this moment, was as close to the center of the universe as one could come. But what you couldn\u2019t see was the slave behind the general. The slave had one task. The slave whispered in the general\u2019s ear, \u201cMemento Mori<\/a>, Memento Mori<\/a>,\u201d echoing, muffling the notwithstanding praise the general enjoyed, reminding him, \u201cRemember, you too are mortal. Remember, you too will die.\u201d<\/p>\n Memento Mori<\/a> is a reminder to be in the present moment. It\u2019s that jolt of happiness when you realize you can let go of trivial matters. It\u2019s Marcus Aurelius<\/a> said, \u201cConcentrate on living what can be lived (which means the present)…then you can spend the time you have left in tranquility. And in kindness. And at peace with the spirit within you.\u201d That\u2019s what we’re all after, isn\u2019t it? Meaningful lives free of the stresses and anxieties we too often so easily let in. Take action. Reflect on death. Carry a Memento Mori coin with you in your pocket<\/a>. Don\u2019t let death linger in the far distance. Bring it closer, make it a practice like Epictetus did, like Marcus Aurelius<\/a>, Seneca<\/a>, Shakespeare, and Mozart, as he explained,<\/p>\n \u201cI have now made a habit of being prepared in all affairs of life for the worst. As death, when we come to consider it closely, is the true goal of our existence, I have formed during the last few years such close relationships with this best and truest friend of mankind that his image is not only no longer terrifying to me but is indeed very soothing and consoling, and I thank my God for graciously granting me the opportunity of learning that death is the key which unlocks the door to our true happiness.\u201d<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n Unlock the key to happiness. Fend off the fear of death not by ignoring, but by staring it right in the face every day.<\/p>\n The third discipline the Stoics devoted a tremendous amount of time to is the discipline of will. The Stoics categorized everything into two buckets: internals in one, externals in the other. The internals are simply the things in which we have control over -\u2013 things like perception and action, those are both choices we control. The externals are just the opposite. The externals are the things we have no control over. And the will decides our attitude to the things that are not within our control, those things that happen to us.<\/p>\n The discipline of will might at first seem at odds with perception and action. But they are in fact nicely aligned.\u00a0We are powerless over\u00a0external<\/span>\u00a0events except for the power we hold to determine what they mean and how we will respond. The will holds this power\u2013when properly disciplined in cultivating an indifference to what is beyond our control\u2013to influence perception and decide how we respond. The will offers another answer in the journey of overcoming our fear of death.<\/p>\n Somewhat akin to perception and the redefining how we look at death, the will furthers things with not just a new outlook, but an acceptance that death is what the universe, what nature, intended for us. This is another belief Marcus Aurelius, Epictetus, and Seneca<\/a> all agreed on, and a belief they came to in their writing, as Marcus Aurelius beautifully composed,<\/p>\n \u201cHow is it that the gods arranged everything with such skill, such care for our well-being, and somehow overlooked one thing: that certain people \u2014 in fact, the best of them, the gods\u2019 own partners, the ones whose piety and good works brought them closest to the divine \u2014 that these people, when they die, should cease to exist forever? Utterly vanished. Well, assuming that\u2019s really true, you can be sure they would have arranged things differently, if that had been appropriate. If it were the right thing to do, they could have done it, and if it were natural, nature would have demanded it. So from the fact that they didn\u2019t\u2013if that\u2019s the case\u2013we can conclude that it was inappropriate.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n The will sees things for what they are and accepts them. This is, Epictetus<\/a> said, “the art of acquiescence.” It is accepting, surrendering to nature. It’s allowing the cycle of the universe to run its course without fighting it or cursing it. In fact, it is more than just acceptance, it is finding peace in that nature’s is doing what is appropriate. That peace is what Seneca<\/a> found,<\/p>\n \u201cAnd I ask you, would you not say that one was the greatest of fools who believed that a lamp was worse off when it was extinguished than before it was lighted? We mortals also are lighted and extinguished; the period of suffering comes in between, but on either side there is a deep peace. For, unless I am very much mistaken, my dear Lucilius, we go astray in thinking that death only follows, when in reality it has both preceded us and will in turn follow us\u201d<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n Cicero similarly echoed, and in a similar bluntness, that to fear death is quite foolish,<\/p>\n \u201cWretched indeed is the man who in the course of a long life has not learned that death is nothing to be feared. For death either completely destroys the human soul, in which case it is negligible, or takes the soul to a place where it can live forever, which makes it desirable. There is no third possibility.\u201d<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n Death, Seneca and Cicero would agree, is not to be feared because it is either not unhappy or happy. If death is indeed a black hole of nothingness, we’ve no consciousness and no pain. We have peace and peace is not something anyone fears. And if eternal life awaits, well, that would also certainly make death nothing to fear.<\/p>\n Perception, Action, and Will. The three seemingly independent but actually interconnected disciples inform how we live, and therefore, teach us how to not fear death.<\/p>\n The last lines of his Meditations<\/em><\/a> deal with how to think about life and death. Marcus Aurelius<\/a>, in perhaps the last words he ever wrote, so eloquently\u00a0puts together words hard not to find solace in. We’ll leave you with those,<\/p>\n \u201cYou\u2019ve lived as a citizen in a great city. Five years or a hundred\u2013what\u2019s the difference? The laws make no distinction. And to be sent away from it, not by a tyrant or a dishonest judge, but by Nature, who first invited you in\u2013why is that so terrible? Like the impresario ringing down the curtain on an actor: \u2018But I\u2019ve only gotten through three acts\u2026!\u2019 Yes. This will be a drama in three acts, the length fixed by the power that directed your creation, and now directs your dissolution. Neither was yours to determine. So make your exit with grace\u2013the same grace shown to you.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n \n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Death. It terrorizes. It paralyzes. If it doesn’t keep us up at night, it wakes us up. It is so certain to come for all of us but when and what follows is so uncertain. We know what we have here and knowing is comforting. Not knowing what awaits there, in death, has tortured minds […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":996,"featured_media":3248,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"inline_featured_image":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\nPERCEPTION<\/h3>\n
ACTION<\/h3>\n
WILL<\/h3>\n
\n
\n