We tend not to see the Stoics as happy people. Marcus Aurelius’ Meditations is dark, his critics say. Even a fan would concede it’s not the lightest fare. Epictetus spoke of the brutality of existence often, mostly because as a slave, he knew it well. Seneca, for his part, spoke so much about death there is literally a modern collection of his writings titled How To Die (it’s quite good by the way).
So where was the room for happiness? For joy? For sucking the marrow out of life?
Paradoxically, it was right there in that dark stuff. Or rather, it was a product of that dark stuff.
Consider what Seneca—who himself lost a child and was exiled in the same short period—writes to Marcia in one of his “Consolation” essays (our favorite Seneca collection here). He tells her, “Snatch the pleasures your children bring, let your children in turn find delight in you, and drain joy to the dregs without delay; no promise has been given you for this night—nay, I have offered too long a respite!—no promise has been given even for his hour.”
It’s because life is unpredictable, it’s because nothing is certain that we must find joy and happiness where we can. Enjoy our children. Do things that are fun. Drink deeply from this moment that you’re in…because while you’re in it, it is about the only certain thing there is.
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